The Magic of Words

This semester I took a creative writing class. When I signed up for it I didn't know exactly what to expect, because the only experience I'd had with a creative writing class was in high school where we watched Twilight Zone and when I wrote villanelles during lunch on the days they were due, and I hated it. But I decided to take a creative writing class.

I didn't realize what I was getting myself into. I didn't realize that, deep down, writing is what I want to do, that authorship is the lens through which I want to see the world. I don't need to write anything groundbreaking, but I do need to write. And I want, more than anything, to be able to write well.

Last night I was able to read pieces by some of my classmates and I recognized the power words have over everything. I learned what it looks like to listen to silence, and I found myself in the kitchen dancing through heartache and I realized that that's what I want to be able to accomplish someday. So I'll keep writing and I'll let you know what happens. Hopefully I'll be figuring it out right along with you.

Some Happy Thoughts

Sometimes I wish people could hear my thoughts because sometimes they're pretty cool or beautiful. And then I remember that I have a blog and that that's what writing is for and I change my mind. And then I'm really glad that the only person who knew about that thought was me. But now all you guys know it, too, so welcome to my brain.

I feel like I forget about this blog pretty often, actually. . .especially because I'm in a creative writing class this semester. All of the little things I notice throughout the day get jotted down on my phone and forgotten about until I have a writing assignment due at midnight. That's kind of how this semester has gone.

I did get accepted to the study abroad program and I'll be going to LONDON! I couldn't be more excited about it. It was kind of a crazy road getting to this point of passports and airfare, but I definitely know that this is what Heavenly Father wants for me right now. And I'm certainly not complaining. Spring can't come quickly enough.

My little brother, Riley, left for an LDS mission last week. I didn't expect to miss talking to him all the time, but I do. His letter home made me okay with it, though. I love that he is able to go and show other people the immense happiness this gospel brings, and I'm excited to hear his stories. He's a good kid and he's going to love it out there.

Sometimes I stop in the middle of my day and realize just how blessed I am. Actually, that happens a lot. Heavenly Father is so good to me and I am so grateful that He knows what's going on and what will bless me the most.

I have realized lately that I have the best job. I get to work with amazing people every day, I get to be proactive and manage myself more often than not, and the people there are the best (I said it twice because it's true)!

I got sick a week ago and completely lost my voice. I have sounded like a dying penguin for the duration of that time and it has been sadly funny. It's been great going to work every day and having my coworkers remark on the minute improvements in my voice. And I sound a lot better now. It's almost back to normal (until I sing. Then I sound like I'm trying to yodel. Which isn't the worst thing in the world. . .) and my coworkers seem just as excited as I am about it.

One coworker in particular has checked in with me every day at the beginning of my shift saying, "Cambry! Say words!" and determining how sad I sound that day. I love that I'm loved.

So basically, life is the BEST! And Heavenly Father is the BEST! And I am so grateful that I have such amazing people, in my life. I honestly can't think of anything I would change except for more Oreos. The world can always use more Oreos.

Active Dreaming

Dreams are the easiest part of living. It's addictingly easy to think of all the things you want to do, the places you want to see, the people you want to be with. . . It's easy to sit on the couch by the window, book in hand, and imagine what it would be like if your dreams were reality. There is very little risk involved in dreaming.

Much harder is actually taking the steps to making those dreams come true.

I'm at a point in my life where I can take several directions with my major, my schooling, and pretty much everything else. And I need to start making decisions because the deadlines will pass me by if I don't.

So I applied to a study abroad program. It was one of the most exhilarating and terrifying experiences of my life. On the one hand, London and Paris have been my dreams since I realized that there was a world that existed outside my backyard and the thought that those dreams becoming reality gives me a feeling of excitement unmatched. On the other, there's the sad prospect that those long-held dreams won't be realized.

But I decided that the potential of me making my dreams come true was a lot more appetizing than the fear that I wouldn't make it. As soon as I clicked on the button to submit my application I realized how empowered I was in that moment. I had chosen to take my dreams off the shelf of my bucket list and present them to the world. As the dust shifted off of their forms they became tangible and real.

When I made that decision to take control of what dreams come to fruition other dreams came to the front stage of my mind, reminding me that I was in control of them too. Of course I can't control everything that happens in my life (things happen and we have to adapt), but I can control what dreams I want to pursue and when. It's the most wonderful thing. I highly recommend it.

The BEST Pumpkin Bars

I had several people ask me for this pumpkin bar recipe so here ya go:

Ingredients:
1 cup butter
2 cups sugar
1 large can pumpkin puree
6 eggs
2 tsp. salt
2 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. nutmeg
1 tsp. ginger
4 1/2 cups flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 cup chocolate chips

Bake at 350˚ for 15-20 minutes. This makes two jelly-roll pans full.

Enjoy!

-Cambry

Magic

This evening, as I was driving home from work, I saw magic.

It was a tree, bright green and slender in front of my neighbor's house. But the green wasn't perfect: the tips of the branches were as red as a New England autumn. It looked as though the residents had used the limbs as paintbrushes for a sunrise.

I thought about the beauty of the picture as I was driving past and the thought back to my Living with Plants class. There is a scientific reason for the leaves furthest from the trunk changing color first (and it's fascinating and I would be happy to tell you about it sometime), but tonight I didn't want to think about the science behind the beauty. It was enough for me to imagine that the tree had collected a little bit of the sunset to better grasp the memory. Because that is something I have not yet been able to do.

It's Already Time for School?

I don't know where the last month went! As I look back it's basically one big blur of work, campfires, sports (and me totally and hilariously failing at them), friends, mosquito bites, and school prep. And now school is starting in a week.

I've always loved back to school season. It's full of crisp things: crisp sheets of paper, binders, and folders; crisp leaves; a crispness in the morning air. . . It's bright and exciting and full of potential.

This is going to be my junior year at BYU and I think I finally know a bit more what to expect. Sure, there are going to be a few curveballs and surprises thrown my way (such is the way of life), but I'm familiar with my school and how things work there. Which is nice, if I'm being honest.

I know that this year is going to be crazy and busy and probably more than a little exhausting. But I also know that it is going to be exhilarating and amazing and absolutely fulfilling. There is nothing else I would rather be doing for the next nine months than going to school. BYU is where I'm supposed to be.

My freshman year was a year of change: I learned a lot (and not much of it came out of my textbooks). I made new friends and send most of them on missions. I adjusted to living away from home, albeit not far, for the first time in my life. I can't imagine who I would be had my freshman year not been the way it was.

My sophomore year was one of growth. I learned a lot more and made a few more friends. I came to know who this girl named Cambry is, and I was able to see that I have a lot that I need to work on. I love who I am and I can't wait to meet the person I'll become. It wasn't an easy year, but I am so grateful for everything I experienced--good and bad--because those experiences had a profound impact on the person I am today.

And now it's time for my junior year. I don't yet know what this year will be but I'm excited to find out. I think it's gonna be a good one.

Today

Today I am in the most wonderful of moods. I feel a bit like a balloon that's ready to float away. Who knows? I may end up doing exactly that.